Apologies to those of you who were expecting a blog about paint. But as I went to switch on the telly at lunchtime I felt the words ' remote control' leap out at me. Still not entirely sure why but I'm hoping it might become clear as I write.
Ever since Ive become a parent I have been struggling to understand the difference between directing, guiding, leading and teaching my children and controlling them. I understand that control is at the root of witchcraft and rebellion and I really dont not want to be controlling my children or anyone else. ( Whilst looking into this online I ve come across a couple of good articles on this topic. http://spirituallighthouse.blogspot.co.uk/2012/01/witchcraft-when-one-tries-to-control.html and a more heavy duty one by Derek Prince www.derekprince.org/publisher/file.aspx?id=1000021524 )
Last night family Hamilton had a major meltdown where we all ended up yelling at each other and there were tears and huffing and storming etc. We seem to need to do this about twice a year - to sort of let off steam and say all the things that need to be said and let everyone have a rant and a vent. Air their grievances, Make a point. We all tell each other exactly where we are all going wrong. Kids tell parents. Parents shout at kids. Tables are thumped. But at the end of it we usually have worked ourselves round to a place where we are talking about the real stuff. Getting underneath the aggro and recognising what is really going on. Its always helpful and good and Im sure if we were a more normal bunch we would be able to have sane and sensible conversations on an ongoing basis so we didnt need these volcanic erruptions. But thats us. Its how we roll. We are a perfect dysfunctional family - but the good thing is we are all trying and the kids know they are loved and are learning that its sometimes hard to be an adult and we dont get it right much of the time.
Other families I know have much more calm and ordered lives. Much more. No fighting or arguing. Life is lived by order and rules and routine and respect. And control. Lots of it. And I have to confess it makes me uncomfortable. When is it OK to tell your child what to wear and when is it OK to let them choose. Even if they choose to go out in orange and pink. With lime green shoes. Should a 14 year old be given freedom of choice in most things he/she does or no choice at all? As parents we are responsible for our kids. But Im pretty sure we should not be controlling them.
And then theres another question. Who is controlling me?
I remember John Paul Jackson speaking once about being in a supermarket and God opening his eyes to see all the demons of lust and greed and avarice sitting on the shelves next to the products shouting out ' buy me. you need me. you want me' to the customers moving about the shop. We cant see the invisible forces which come through the television screens and over the radio at us tempting us to spend spend spend, borrow borrow borrow. How much are we controlled by the culture in which we live? By the education system we go through? By the expectations of others and the words and actions of those close to us.?
I listen to the Archers on radio 4. Theres a brilliant storyline playing out at the moment where Rob, who is such a reasonable and nice and loving husband, is gradually eroding his wifes confidence and restricting her life as he takes control of every area of it. Subtly. Almost imperceptibly. In ways that hardly anyone would realise were manipulative. Its so well written and so chilling to listen to as the audience slowly realises that something sinister is going on - a trap is being laid. And nobody in Ambridge is going to either see it or believe it could be possible. Manipulators can be super clever and devious . We dont know we have been controlled until its too late. The enemy is like that.
Lord , as we think about the approaching season of Easter when we remember everything You did to buy our freedom for us, please help us to be fully submitted to You and only You. Protect us from those manipulating and controlling forces which want to oust You from Your rightful place. Show us where we are controlling and manipulative towards others and root out the causes so that we can be a blessing and not a curse. Let us be good and Godly influencers and examples full of truth and light just like Jesus. Amen
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